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Young men have attitudes--older men are not quite as cocky as the young ones.
That has not been my experience. Not at all. I'm 43 and the men I've dated in their late 40s or early 50s were much too full of themselves for my taste.
However, this could also be because they are Baby Boomers. They were little boys before the sexual revolution, when little boys were pretty much catered to and given the impression that the world is their oyster, with the example of stay-at-home moms doing "woman's work" to back it up. I've found Gen-X men, many of whom had working mothers as living examples of equality, to be far less likely to be that way.
Why should men pursue women when so many of their legs are like Denny's? Always open.
LOL but so true. Seems like some women serve up the booty quicker than ever and wonder why after some men hit it, they leave. Somen men have very little respect for women who give it up too fast. I think that most men want the "nooky" when they've gotten to know her as a person, which takes time
That has not been my experience. Not at all. I'm 43 and the men I've dated in their late 40s or early 50s were much too full of themselves for my taste.
However, this could also be because they are Baby Boomers. They were little boys before the sexual revolution, when little boys were pretty much catered to and given the impression that the world is their oyster, with the example of stay-at-home moms doing "woman's work" to back it up. I've found Gen-X men, many of whom had working mothers as living examples of equality, to be far less likely to be that way.
No I think the baby boomers as a whole were just a spoiled generation with a demand for entitlement and they are on the fast track to torching this country for decades to come. Their parents grew up during the depression and WW2 and most didn't have much so when post war prosperity came along, they spoiled their children(baby boomers). Sure there are decent sensible boomers out there but many are keen to get their fat entitlements no matter if the X and Y generations will be paying out the wazoo for it. We know we have a lot of work to do as the X and Y generations.
And their are just as many nutty men as their are women out there from that generation of boomers.
In terms of equality as humans, I think there is a case to make for that and was, however the radical feminists(as all radicals do) when berzerk and into overdrive with "equality" to the point it is confusing men and women with their roles in society and ruining the family(the least expensive and most stable social support system ever devised). Men and women are NOT the same. We have different reproductive systems, different cocktails of hormones and chemicals in our bodies, different body structure and a different way of thinking and communication. No amount of social engineering and stamping your feet will ever change that.
I see it every week in the Daily Mail UK newspaper, as there is always some commentary from some 38-50 year old women bemoaning the lack of desire for men to settle and procreate with them. Wonder why? Well "women can do it all" right? They might do it all, but not well. And men are saying if you can do it all have at it honey! Thereby it does nothing but encourage men to be players and use the desperation these women have or it encourages men to be unsupportive in relationships or it's an encouragement for men just to sit on the sidelines.
And it goes back to the point of this thread, why wont men pursue women? And well who knows what to do anymore. Women want to be pursued, yet they don't want to be pursued, but maybe pursued a little, but not too much, etc...
That's why I say to men, you have to ignore all this societal, progressive Cosmo mag nonsense and do what you have to do. If they like it fine, if they don't fine, but don't waste your time dancing around them and being a doormat.
What's not to like about your response? It's excellent. And really, who cares what I think? I'm an internet stranger throwing my two cents at you. No worries here.
For what it's worth, you seem like a decent person, just down on dating. It happens to everyone at some point, women too. It's how you handle it that matters. Take a break. Do your own thing. Fill up your life with friends and activities, or, if your life is already full, try something new. Shake yourself out of your rut. When I wasn't enjoying dating anymore, I took a year off. Instead I traveled with my chick buddies, pursued hobbies, and enjoyed my freedom. I don't know how old you are, but I was 30 at the time and it was the best thing I ever did. I made a lot of friends during that year, and later ended up dating and marrying one of them. (Granted, we divorced later, but it wasn't nasty horrible and I don't hate the guy. But hey, it proves that not even a marriage certificate is a guarantee.)
A year from now you may change your tune, or maybe you won't. Point is, you like yourself--and you don't sound bitter. Discouraged, yes, but discouragement can be overcome. Bitterness will leave you playing solitaire for the rest of your life.
I just thought my response might incur some criticism. Blame it on my own cynicism.
I try to be decent. I don't like the alpha male stuff. I like to take a soft, yet honest approach with women. As for being down on dating, well, I haven't really dated anyone. I did make an attempt, but it failed. Actually, I have never been in a relationship either. I have been putting alot of things in my life. I am in school and I try to do more things.As for my age, I am 23 years old, and I turn 24 in April.
Well, only time can tell. I do like myself, for myself. I am not really bitter, or at least I don't try to be. Right now, I am just waiting out for the woman who will love and accept me as I am, for all of my little quirks.
guys have definitely backed off, this applies to marriage to foreign brides too. i think the high divorce rate could have something to do with guys cooling off. then too, i think divorce tends to favor women financially.
guys are being more prudent about jumping into marriage. life is short, try to be happy.
I just thought my response might incur some criticism. Blame it on my own cynicism.
I try to be decent. I don't like the alpha male stuff. I like to take a soft, yet honest approach with women. As for being down on dating, well, I haven't really dated anyone. I did make an attempt, but it failed. Actually, I have never been in a relationship either. I have been putting alot of things in my life. I am in school and I try to do more things.As for my age, I am 23 years old, and I turn 24 in April.
Well, only time can tell. I do like myself, for myself. I am not really bitter, or at least I don't try to be. Right now, I am just waiting out for the woman who will love and accept me as I am, for all of my little quirks.
You know I have found the past few years being bluntly honest and not trying to say what people think has got me rather far out there. People appreciate that honesty I give them whether it's my opinion they have solicited, or about who I am or what have you. So I think being honest about who you are as a person is a good thing.
At your age, I wouldn't worry too much about women and all that societal stuff. Go out and have some adventure. Travel the world, do some interesting activities, take up some new hobbies and get out of the house or your local town every once in a while.
I used to have a harder time conversing with people in the past, but then I went out and did some cool stuff that I wanted to do. Women just want to talk to me because I always have something to talk about. Sure a lot of women like the bog standard guy sittin around drinkin beer and watchin football, but plenty of women like a bit more. I'm fun to be around and I have tons to do and talk about.
And if you sitting around waiting as you say for a woman to find you, well you have to be out there to be found. In other words go out and live an interesting life and you will be more easily found and it will be easier to find someone yourself. Also, if there has been one thing I learned traveling the world is don't be afraid to ask questions or ask for anything for that matter. You'd be surprised at how many people, hot women included will help you out just because you asked nicely.
The whole mating game is based just on that: MATING.
A 45 year old woman is near infertile and thus not suited as a mate because she can not produce children. The production of children is, ultimately, why men and women get together. Even if you have no intention of ever having children, it still has created the attraction switches between the genders. An old woman does not flip those switches like a young, fresh woman does.
Sure, you can "cougar it up" if you look good enough but most men, myself included, only act as cub to cougar because its easy sex. Sure, dating a cougar can be fun for other reasons: her experience and ability to kick in more of the tab, but most of us will take the youngest, freshest, most fertile woman we can get our manhood into.
Of course, there are other reasons as well. Some related to the above and others not. One related reason is that women, sadly misinformed that tey could spend their youth, beauty, and fertility on their careers, education, fun, and bad boys, have now found out that no one wants to marry a used up woman. No man wants to hear, as I heard, "well I had my fun but now it's time for you to marry me!" These words are especially ignored if hurled at a man who was ignored for a good chunk of his life by women like her or especially that particular woman.
Other reasons:
1. avaliability of porn- helps a man to take that edge off without games, wondering if he's going to get lucky, fear of disease or pregnancy or false false rape accusations, etc....
2. men who were ignored in their 20's have experienced a drop in their sex drives. Women simply lack that power over them that they once did. Once these men have their sex drives under control, they may decide that they lived ok without a woman for this long... might as well continue.
3. awareness of the corrupt family courts: family courts can destroy a husband and father. Even if not married, incraesingly the law is overstepping its bounds by forcing alimony-like conditions in areas where neither marriage nor common-law marriage exist, such as co-habitating and even to a MISTRESS!!!
3a. judges can order crushing child support based on "imputed wages", i.e. because the judge thinks you can earn that money, it becomes the basis of child support. That you have lost your job, those earnings were based on 70 hour work weeks, or that worknig at that level is bad for your health is not relevant.
4. Sexual harrassment suits: work used to be a great place to meet someone- same social and economic level, same interests, something in common... and indeed there were many secretaries who wanted to marry their boss. NOW you can't even ask a woman out without risking censure and job loss.
5. Excessive demands: women think that because they have jobs and make money, they deserve a man who makes more. That she may be older, ugly, out of shape, have a terrible attitude, and thuglets is irrelevant. I see this a great deal among black professional women especially who bemoan the lack of "good black men." Those good black men are the ones they ignored though and now, at the peak of their power, sure as heck ain't gonna settle down with her! They can get a younger, sexier woman who is agreeable and doesn't have kids. So WHY would he settle with the older package?
There are other reasons as well but I need to head out. Just answering your question.
And let the church say amen!!
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