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Kathryn Aragon...is Puerto Rican . I'm hispanic as well. I've dated girls who had racist families and when it was implied I was hispanic all racial stuff stopped.
My family is first generation latinos and we were taught that the best husbands were white, the best wives were latinas and everything else was UN acceptable. White women who marry into latino families have alot to prove. Latina women who marry white have a good leg up since they are stereotyped as loyal, honest and loving.
Kathryn is injecting herself into a black white phenomena. This problem ain't got nothing to do with hispanic interracial marriage. Nearly everyone accepts that!
Where on earth did you get this idea?
I am not Puerto Rican. I am 100 percent English/Northern European and have the DNA test to prove it -LOL. I am a plain ol' white girl. I was raised in a WASP family by my two completely white parents - LOL. I married an African American man who was nearly 100 percent AA, with a little Native American thrown in for good measure. My kids are biracial - half white and half African American.
My DAUGHTER married a Latino man. My other daughter married a totally white guy of Czech lineage, from Iowa. My oldest son married a girl from Korea and my youngest son is not married, but shows a penchant for blonde cheerleader types - LOL.
So I am not "interjecting myself into a black white phenomenon." I experience it in real life, every day of my life in my multiracial family. Every one of my beautiful grandchildren is a mixture of European, African American, and several have Latino ancestry as well, through their dad. And I have one full blooded Korean grandson - one of my daughters and her husband adopted him a few years ago (OMG he is precious!). Oh, and my adopted brother is half Korean.
Here I am - plain ol' white lady - with my biracial (half white, half AA) daughter and her Sicilian/Panamanian/PUERTO RICAN husband and their multiracial kids:
Here's me and my two very White, AngloSaxon, Protestant parents back in the day:
My other daughter and her husband on their wedding day:
My four biracial kids when they were little:
Sorry, but I don't have any pictures of me with their dad - he and I have not had a warm fuzzy relationship after our divorce about 25 years ago, but life goes on.
Please don't tell me I don't know what I'm talking about - LOL!
Last edited by KathrynAragon; 02-24-2014 at 01:18 PM..
Although, the one thing that makes me giggle about this situation is this idea that they actually believe they are keeping you and your family a secret. In the age of social media? Really? Guaranteed everyone knows the truth and their elaborate fictions are just making them seem utterly ridiculous, if not clinically insane, to any reasonable person they associate with. They're making complete asses of themselves.
I would take that thought and hold it close, like a warm fuzzy bunny.
Although, the one thing that makes me giggle about this situation is this idea that they actually believe they are keeping you and your family a secret. In the age of social media? Really? Guaranteed everyone knows the truth and their elaborate fictions are just making them seem utterly ridiculous, if not clinically insane, to any reasonable person they associate with. They're making complete asses of themselves.
I would take that thought and hold it close, like a warm fuzzy bunny.
I thought about this a few days ago and it gave me a chuckle as well. These inlaws are almost certainly the laughingstock of their peer group. NOT because they have an AA daughter inlaw and biracial grandkids, but because they are ignorant enough to honestly believe that their friends don't know it.
I'm a white man married to a black woman, and we have 3 kids between us from our respective previous marriages.
Truthfully, I never even think about the race issue, 99% of the time, because it's usually such a non-issue. I see quite a few interracial couples out and about in public, and I think sometimes, they're hyper-sensitive about how others view them -- when in reality, most just don't care either way.
My ex-wife's mom was always racist and she refused to let my daughter visit with her "as long as she was living in same house as a black woman", after I got re-married. That was awkward, especially when my kid got old enough to start asking why she never got to see her anymore. But guess what? The woman developed a brain tumor a few years later and passed away. So now there's not only no more explaining to do on my part, but she's the one who had to live out her final days not even seeing one of her grand-kids.
Life's too short to waste time and energy on people who bring hate, stress and/or difficulties and don't add anything of value.
Quote:
Originally Posted by KathrynAragon
I thought about this a few days ago and it gave me a chuckle as well. These inlaws are almost certainly the laughingstock of their peer group. NOT because they have an AA daughter inlaw and biracial grandkids, but because they are ignorant enough to honestly believe that their friends don't know it.
I'm a white man married to a black woman, and we have 3 kids between us from our respective previous marriages.
Truthfully, I never even think about the race issue, 99% of the time, because it's usually such a non-issue. I see quite a few interracial couples out and about in public, and I think sometimes, they're hyper-sensitive about how others view them -- when in reality, most just don't care either way.
My ex-wife's mom was always racist and she refused to let my daughter visit with her "as long as she was living in same house as a black woman", after I got re-married. That was awkward, especially when my kid got old enough to start asking why she never got to see her anymore. But guess what? The woman developed a brain tumor a few years later and passed away. So now there's not only no more explaining to do on my part, but she's the one who had to live out her final days not even seeing one of her grand-kids.
Life's too short to waste time and energy on people who bring hate, stress and/or difficulties and don't add anything of value.
Right on. And let me tell another personal story:
My parents are GREAT. They raised us in a non racist home where racism was simply not allowed to flourish. They had to stand up against some of THEIR older relatives when they decided to adopt my brother, who was half Korean. I even found LETTERS from some of them begging my parents not to "complicate their lives" by adopting a child of another race, and asking why they simply couldn't adopt a little white baby!!!!!! OMG. So my parents already knew how to stand up against racism and they have always totally accepted their beautiful biracial kids and multiracial grandkids. They love them with a great passion and that love is definitely reciprocated. Those who are denying themselves this joy are idiots.
Anyway, a few years ago my parents moved to a retirement community that is about 97 percent older white folks. I wondered if this would be awkward to them to explain, because my parents are really big into family pictures - as we all are (in case you can't tell). All of us have lots of family photos around the house and when my parents moved, they just put all those beautiful multiracial photos back up.
COME TO FIND OUT, TONS OF THEIR NEW FRIENDS HAVE BIRACIAL AND MULTIRACIAL FAMILIES. Keep in mind that these "old folks" were the original hippies. Nearly everyone they meet has stories or photos of biracial and multiracial relatives. And this is in a well heeled retirement community.
I really don't know what to say. I can't believe that the "younger generation" didn't speak up for you when you were introduced as "the housekeeper" or when you and your children were not invited to the cousins' weddings and holidays or there aren't photographs of all of the grandchildren in the house, etc.
However, I would really have to wonder why his other relatives didn't stand up for you against his sister and mother. Perhaps they really aren't as accepting as you think that they are.
Or maybe they do like the OP but they don't want to compromise their relationship, for various reasons, with the mother and the aunt ? Maybe they're not sure what to do and it's a difficult situation for them too ?
Also, the younger relatives might be waiting for the OP's husband to stand up for her and then they will stand with the OP and her husband.
Absolutely do not do this. Your husband is fighting for you every step of the way. For him to lose you because you quit will destroy him. Stand with him.
[if you leave him he will not be at peace]
THIS!
My poor niece in law (if there is such a thing) goes through this with her grandmother (my MIL). Same situation, Same upper class "old south", complete with antebellum home and poor Jeffery (Nephew in law?) has dealt with this, because he loves Amanda so much! They have 3 gorgeous girls who we love dearly.
Jeffery and Amanda live within 5 miles of the wicked witch's house (and my husband and I were "escorted" out of town over the way she treated he and the girls.)
Jeffery, however, is a peacemaker. He just somehow lives above it. Like I said (before the police escorted me off her manicured lawn and all I did was point out facts, I didn't even raise my voice), Jeffery loves Amanda more than she (MIL) can ever hate him.
Just love your husband and let him love you. "What God has brought together, let no man put assunder"
Kathryn Aragon...is Puerto Rican . I'm hispanic as well. I've dated girls who had racist families and when it was implied I was hispanic all racial stuff stopped.
My family is first generation latinos and we were taught that the best husbands were white, the best wives were latinas and everything else was UN acceptable. White women who marry into latino families have alot to prove. Latina women who marry white have a good leg up since they are stereotyped as loyal, honest and loving.
Kathryn is injecting herself into a black white phenomena. This problem ain't got nothing to do with hispanic interracial marriage. Nearly everyone accepts that!
Spoken like a true...mistaken person! It was tempting to use the word you used in an earlier post, but I'll take a higher road in the hope you change your mind. Please let us know if we need to fact check anything else for you.
You should also know that Jeb Bush is married to a latina woman who was born in Mexico. The rest of the family does not have a problem with it. They are regarded as fairly conservative people. I just wanted to give you and a few others that have a problem with interracial marriage how truly out of touch and bigoted that viewpoint is in this day and age. It is not too late to become more tolerant and change your mind.
Kathryn Aragon...is Puerto Rican . I'm hispanic as well. I've dated girls who had racist families and when it was implied I was hispanic all racial stuff stopped.
My family is first generation latinos and we were taught that the best husbands were white, the best wives were latinas and everything else was UN acceptable. White women who marry into latino families have alot to prove. Latina women who marry white have a good leg up since they are stereotyped as loyal, honest and loving.
Kathryn is injecting herself into a black white phenomena. This problem ain't got nothing to do with hispanic interracial marriage. Nearly everyone accepts that!
You seem to be more obsessed with blacks marrying whites. So you should also know that Paul Ryan, the GOP nominee for Vice President in 2012, has dated black women. His brother is married to a black woman. Again, the rest of the family has no problem with it.
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Yep, this ....
