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Old 01-22-2017, 11:14 PM
 
10,612 posts, read 12,132,699 times
Reputation: 16779

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The frustrating thing about discussions such as this is that participants are discussing different angles of a general topic that can be so broad as to be interpreted any number of ways.
The whips/chains and prostitutes comment is the kind of remark after which I leave the conversation – because it just gets too ridiculous for me and I feel it's no longer an intelligent or productive discussion.

So here’s my final comments on the entire issue…..
I believe I already conceded that there are plenty of times when a person should dress to impress: at work, in court, and in any other situation where there’s something in it for you to dress that way. (even if that is only a compliment from others.)

Asking about people dressing when going out with neighbors one might want to have an ongoing relationship with and therefore may WANT to impress in some way – or at least not have them form the wrong impression -- is in no way the same situation as caring what a random cashier, or sales clerk, or fellow nail salon or barbershop patron may think of you dress.

I USED TO wear better clothes to work. Then I snagged a sweater I liked – and realized others were coming in in jeans and sneakers. SO – as someone who naturally DOES NOT LIKE dressing higher than jeans and a T-Shirt – I asked myself what’s in it for me—why should I wear my better clothes – when I’m not comfortable dressing that way. There’s no promotion potential, I don’t work with the public, and even my weekday casual is still a step up from other co-workers' jeans and T-Shirt. When I’m out in street I really couldn’t care less what people I don’t’ even know think about me. And I think people who DO care what what others whom they don’t even know think of them – need to examine why that is.

So, other than to please his wife – why should the OP’s husband who is retired – dress in any other manner than the one in which HE wants to dress, or present himself?

 
Old 01-23-2017, 03:55 AM
 
Location: Mount Airy, Maryland
16,278 posts, read 10,418,527 times
Reputation: 27599
Quote:
Originally Posted by pikabike View Post
You are equating old everyday type clothing with dressing like prostitutes?
No, no I was not. If you had read my post I cleary said that was an extreme example to challenge the idea that we are not judged by what we wear. In some instances such as ratty shoes and a beat up flannel, just as with leather and whips, we are judged. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.

Last edited by DaveinMtAiry; 01-23-2017 at 04:16 AM..
 
Old 01-23-2017, 04:01 AM
 
Location: Mount Airy, Maryland
16,278 posts, read 10,418,527 times
Reputation: 27599
Quote:
Originally Posted by selhars View Post
The frustrating thing about discussions such as this is that participants are discussing different angles of a general topic that can be so broad as to be interpreted any number of ways.
The whips/chains and prostitutes comment is the kind of remark after which I leave the conversation – because it just gets too ridiculous for me and I feel it's no longer an intelligent or productive discussion.
Since many proclaim departure but often come back please see my post above.

What you and others have totally ignored was the line about the daughters being embarrassed to be out with him. This isn't just roll your eyes at dad with his socks and sandals on, this is much worse. As I said he is being selfish.

Last edited by DaveinMtAiry; 01-23-2017 at 04:18 AM..
 
Old 01-23-2017, 04:14 AM
 
Location: Mount Airy, Maryland
16,278 posts, read 10,418,527 times
Reputation: 27599
Quote:
Originally Posted by borninsac View Post




My other comment is that your husband "paid his dues" so he's a fully-paid member in the clothing attire club he chooses to belong. Dress well, stand tall when in his company holding his hand and being the best trophy wife you can be.
So it's the wife's duty to present herself as the "best trophy wife (she) can be" yet the husband is only required to dress in a presentable manner after she pleads with him as described in the opening post?

Wow. Just, wow.
 
Old 01-23-2017, 06:11 AM
 
7,899 posts, read 7,113,478 times
Reputation: 18603
Too bad we don't have an actual picture or an accurate description of the Mr Kudzu's clothing. Without that, what could be a very nice flannel shirt turns into "beat up". The pants were described as old and baggy, not torn, not dirty, not stained. I have plenty of old clothes that look good. Since these were jeans, I guess old would mean faded. Isn't that one of those fashion, trendy looks? As to baggy who knows? That could be pants that are just loose fitting and comfortable. Then there are the shoes which were described as ratty and old. Again I have plenty of old shoes that are in good condition and some appear new. I have no idea what ratty means. That could be dirty, torn, stained, or maybe just comfortable shoes that are not fashionable.


We don't really know what Mr. Kudzu looks like, except for the final statement that worse than all the rest was the fact that he carries a key chain. Isn't this like complaining about someone with a pocket protector? This doesn't exactly put him in the position of being grossly out of step with the supposed norms of society. Then we have a couple of teen age daughters who are embarrassed. I had a couple of teenage daughters. Parents never meet the expectations. Teenaged girls need to grow up and learn that there are other things in life beyond preening and trying to attract a mate. Unfortunately some never learn that.
 
Old 01-23-2017, 06:27 AM
 
Location: Texas
4,852 posts, read 3,648,319 times
Reputation: 15374
My husband can dress anyway he likes. He is 71 and has earned the right. I do put out clothes for him when we are going to a concert or dinner.

You might try setting clothes out for him.

My mother used to have an issue with my father not bathing. He would really smell sometimes. But that is another issue I guess. I miss them both.
 
Old 01-23-2017, 07:40 AM
 
Location: Mount Airy, Maryland
16,278 posts, read 10,418,527 times
Reputation: 27599
It is wild to me is this thread went on for 25 pages with so many completely opposite views.
 
Old 01-23-2017, 08:15 AM
 
Location: Mayacama Mtns in CA
14,520 posts, read 8,768,824 times
Reputation: 11356
Quote:
Originally Posted by DaveinMtAiry View Post
It is wild to me is this thread went on for 25 pages with so many completely opposite views.
Yes, and the conversation has been decent and polite even as folks disagree. It's a good thing. I have enjoyed learning about the similarities of thought and action which the mechanical engineers possess.
 
Old 01-23-2017, 08:24 AM
 
Location: Mount Airy, Maryland
16,278 posts, read 10,418,527 times
Reputation: 27599
Quote:
Originally Posted by Macrina View Post
Yes, and the conversation has been decent and polite even as folks disagree. It's a good thing. I have enjoyed learning about the similarities of thought and action which the mechanical engineers possess.
Glad you said that as I was feeling that a few of mine could have been taken the wrong way as they appeared a bit ruder than intended. But of course there is a time limit for editing for reasons I will never understand
 
Old 01-23-2017, 08:37 AM
 
Location: Forests of Maine
37,468 posts, read 61,406,816 times
Reputation: 30414
Quote:
Originally Posted by Macrina View Post
Yes, and the conversation has been decent and polite even as folks disagree. It's a good thing. I have enjoyed learning about the similarities of thought and action which the mechanical engineers possess.
And Electrical Engineers, and Chemical Engineers, and Nuclear Physicists, and ...

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