Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I think if parents truly love their children, they would spank them to teach them a lesson that whatever they did was wrong.. I believe that it must start at an early age. Now, how to spank and what to use is up for debate, but I always think of "tough love" when kids get spanked. The old saying "it hurts me more than it hurts you" is true!
I think if parents truly love their children, they would spank them to teach them a lesson that whatever they did was wrong.. I believe that it must start at an early age. Now, how to spank and what to use is up for debate, but I always think of "tough love" when kids get spanked. The old saying "it hurts me more than it hurts you" is true!
I used a 2 x 4, or was it a 4 x 8? UNTIL HE WAS A YEAR OLD, THEN OF COURSE, I HAD TO MOVE TO STEEL REBARB
This response really does not have anything to do with spanking, but the mind set between parents nowadays and parents from a few decades ago.
Scenario back then - I'm playing baseball and break Mrs. Smith's window, I'm scared I run and hide, Mrs. Smith saw me break the window. I don't fess up so she comes over and tells my mother what I did. Mom punishes me for lying, makes me save up my allowance to pay for Mrs. Smith's window or makes me do chores for Mrs. Smith until the window is paid for.
Scenario nowadays - I'm playing baseball and break Mrs. Smith's window, I'm scared I run and hide, Mrs. Smith saw me break the window. I don't fess up so she comes over and tells my mother what I did. Mom gets defensive with Mrs. Smith and says my kids wouldn't do that. Questions me, I say no I didn't do it. Then mom tells Mrs. Smith, my kid is not a liar, she didn't break your window. Angry words are exchanged and Mrs. Smith leaves and either ignores the situation or calls the police.
I think you know where I'm going with this
Actually, my response has a lot to do with spanking vs. not spanking. The VAST MAJORITY of parents I dealt with, whose teenagers were totally out of control, were of the "I don't believe in spanking my kid" attitude.
Actually, my response has a lot to do with spanking vs. not spanking. The VAST MAJORITY of parents I dealt with, whose teenagers were totally out of control, were of the "I don't believe in spanking my kid" attitude.
I know what you meant lakerat!! You made an excellent point. I'm sure you've seen alot of that "way of thinking" in your profession. My example goes along with your example. Parents nowadays have this carefree attitude now where their child can do no wrong and anyone who tries to tell them so, they get argumentative about it. Same with spanking. Kids nowadays don't listen to their parents at all (not all kids, but a lot). Your example that you stated about the 15 yr old - I would of gotten cracked upside the head and it would of been very much deserved.
This comment is not directed at you:
My parents disciplined me from a young age (yes, without the spanking, but it wasn't something they wouldn't do, my brothers did get spankings now and then) and taught me to behave myself and show respect for my elders. I wouldn't dream in a million years of talking to my parents like that. Why do kids think they can do that?? Because the parents let them get away with and never stopped it from happening again.
I've always believed that one swift pat on the butt got their attention. Then set down and talk. If it's more then one swift pat, then it's anger and isn't warranted. One's enough. Just wake them up and get their attention.
One time, my daughter got a swift pat. She turned around and said, "I'm going to report you." I handed her the phone and even offered to dial it for her. Then I explained to her, that in my house, this is how it works. And if you call them up, I'll still be here. You, they will take away.
Out of 7 kids, that was the only act of diffiance.
I know what you meant lakerat!! You made an excellent point. I'm sure you've seen alot of that "way of thinking" in your profession. My example goes along with your example. Parents nowadays have this carefree attitude now where their child can do no wrong and anyone who tries to tell them so, they get argumentative about it. Same with spanking. Kids nowadays don't listen to their parents at all (not all kids, but a lot). Your example that you stated about the 15 yr old - I would of gotten cracked upside the head and it would of been very much deserved.
This comment is not directed at you:
My parents disciplined me from a young age (yes, without the spanking, but it wasn't something they wouldn't do, my brothers did get spankings now and then) and taught me to behave myself and show respect for my elders. I wouldn't dream in a million years of talking to my parents like that. Why do kids think they can do that?? Because the parents let them get away with and never stopped it from happening again.
Very good points.
I just threw my scenario out to get some feedback and share a little experience I have run across. In no way do I advocate physically, or mentally, abusing a child. But, in certain circumstances, physical discipline is appropriate.
Actually, my response has a lot to do with spanking vs. not spanking. The VAST MAJORITY of parents I dealt with, whose teenagers were totally out of control, were of the "I don't believe in spanking my kid" attitude.
Yes, my son is a police officer and he makes the same statement, or, they are beaten up every day which is a totally different sceinero...
I've always believed that one swift pat on the butt got their attention. Then set down and talk. If it's more then one swift pat, then it's anger and isn't warranted. One's enough. Just wake them up and get their attention.
One time, my daughter got a swift pat. She turned around and said, "I'm going to report you." I handed her the phone and even offered to dial it for her. Then I explained to her, that in my house, this is how it works. And if you call them up, I'll still be here. You, they will take away.
Out of 7 kids, that was the only act of diffiance.
I know what you meant lakerat!! You made an excellent point. I'm sure you've seen alot of that "way of thinking" in your profession. My example goes along with your example. Parents nowadays have this carefree attitude now where their child can do no wrong and anyone who tries to tell them so, they get argumentative about it. Same with spanking. Kids nowadays don't listen to their parents at all (not all kids, but a lot). Your example that you stated about the 15 yr old - I would of gotten cracked upside the head and it would of been very much deserved.
This comment is not directed at you:
My parents disciplined me from a young age (yes, without the spanking, but it wasn't something they wouldn't do, my brothers did get spankings now and then) and taught me to behave myself and show respect for my elders. I wouldn't dream in a million years of talking to my parents like that. Why do kids think they can do that?? Because the parents let them get away with and never stopped it from happening again.
yes, indeed...they do...b/c they know they can....thank you for this post....
I believe in spanking...but I never was able to slap my son across the face...and to tell you the truth, once he back mouthed an adult...and I think I told this story before...I told him "OUTSIDE" and at that time he was bigger then me....I grabbed him by the shirt collar and bought him in close...I played the part of a shall we say, female Clint Eastwood...and told him, "yanno, I never ever slapped you across the face b/c your a human being and I don't believe in it...but, the next time you back mouth an adult...I'll hit you in the mouth with a closed fist", and I gathered my fist up and put it underneath his lip", then I left him go, and said, "get up to your room and stay there!"
I was a single mom, his father was very wealthy, and I knew if I left my son go, and he got in trouble, I'd probably be facing a custody battle....therefore, I had to be strict...but, that incident was tough...very very tough....and I prayed that he'd never do that again...and he didn't. I was sooooo lucky he didn't. Why? Because I don't believe in making a threat that you cannot follow thru with...gets me upset just thinking about it.
Scenario nowadays - I'm playing baseball and break Mrs. Smith's window, I'm scared I run and hide, Mrs. Smith saw me break the window. I don't fess up so she comes over and tells my mother what I did. Mom gets defensive with Mrs. Smith and says my kids wouldn't do that. Questions me, I say no I didn't do it. Then mom tells Mrs. Smith, my kid is not a liar, she didn't break your window. Angry words are exchanged and Mrs. Smith leaves and either ignores the situation or calls the police.
I think you know where I'm going with this
As a matter of fact, a scenario happened liked that to my brother and I when we first moved to a new neighborhood. Except we were accused of abusing a cat, and my parents said we would never do that.... EXCEPT.... WE DIDN'T DO THAT. Either the adult was a bonafide liar, or confused some other kid. I can't imagine the destruction of a relationship between parent and child if the kid was accused of something they DIDN'T do, and the parent did NOT believe them.
In the window scenario, I think saving up an allowance to pay for it is a very appropriate punishment. It completely conforms with a form of discipline called Logical Consequences.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
UNTIL HE WAS A YEAR OLD, THEN OF COURSE, I HAD TO MOVE TO STEEL REBARB
