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A lot of mean and catty/bitchy women around here.. geesh
Just because a woman sends her child to daycare while she stays at home to take care of the things around the home doesn't make her a bad parent and it doesn't mean that she has to have some bigger issues going on :roll eyes: Maybe she wants to socialize her child
A parent or parents, or work full time even earning 100K+ and has their children in full time day care and doesn't get much time to spend with their kids aren't bad parents either. Maybe they are busting their asses off now so that their future is financially secure.
And SAHM moms aren't all bad either just because they want to keep their child to themselves all day
What is bad- when parents continue to bash other parents for the way they raise their children. What works for one doesn't work for all.
A lot of mean and catty/bitchy women around here.. geesh
Just because a woman sends her child to daycare while she stays at home to take care of the things around the home doesn't make her a bad parent and it doesn't mean that she has to have some bigger issues going on :roll eyes: Maybe she wants to socialize her child
A parent or parents, or work full time even earning 100K+ and has their children in full time day care and doesn't get much time to spend with their kids aren't bad parents either. Maybe they are busting their asses off now so that their future is financially secure.
And SAHM moms aren't all bad either just because they want to keep their child to themselves all day
What is bad- when parents continue to bash other parents for the way they raise their children. What works for one doesn't work for all.
Yeah that second $100k really makes a difference to a 3 year old \
Thank you to those ladies who read my post and found something in it they could at least relate to and for realizing that I'm singling out those parents who treat their children on par with their pets - they walk them and feed them when they are home but otherwise rely on others to care for them.
That daycares don't raise kids is exactly my point - if the kid is there 11-12 hours a day, then eats dinner out with a teacher/babysitter - who exactly is raising this child?
I saw an episode of Wife Swap or some such nonsense and this poor teenaged girl ate dinner every night with the housekeeper...she was the only constant adult influence in this girl's life as the parents left early in the morning and didn't come home til late at night. You could tell how lonely this poor girl was and that she just wanted one of her parents to talk to her...I wanted to cry...And these folks probably made $300K or more...their take out bills were like $1000 a week!
These are the parents I'm addressing in my posts...
Maybe not at 3 but it could be a nest egg for if one of the parents ends up unable to work. Or even for when the child is older
And once again, like I asked the OP... what business is it of yours how other parents choose to raise their children? Does their choice effect you personally? Or do you harbor some jealousy somewhere that just can't allow you to deal with the fact that parents are allowed to do what they feel best for THEIR children
Quote:
Originally Posted by orrmobl
Yeah that second $100k really makes a difference to a 3 year old \
Thank you to those ladies who read my post and found something in it they could at least relate to and for realizing that I'm singling out those parents who treat their children on par with their pets - they walk them and feed them when they are home but otherwise rely on others to care for them.
That daycares don't raise kids is exactly my point - if the kid is there 11-12 hours a day, then eats dinner out with a teacher/babysitter - who exactly is raising this child?
I saw an episode of Wife Swap or some such nonsense and this poor teenaged girl ate dinner every night with the housekeeper...she was the only constant adult influence in this girl's life as the parents left early in the morning and didn't come home til late at night. You could tell how lonely this poor girl was and that she just wanted one of her parents to talk to her...I wanted to cry...And these folks probably made $300K or more...their take out bills were like $1000 a week!
These are the parents I'm addressing in my posts...
Yeah that second $100k really makes a difference to a 3 year old \
Thank you to those ladies who read my post and found something in it they could at least relate to and for realizing that I'm singling out those parents who treat their children on par with their pets - they walk them and feed them when they are home but otherwise rely on others to care for them.
That daycares don't raise kids is exactly my point - if the kid is there 11-12 hours a day, then eats dinner out with a teacher/babysitter - who exactly is raising this child?
I saw an episode of Wife Swap or some such nonsense and this poor teenaged girl ate dinner every night with the housekeeper...she was the only constant adult influence in this girl's life as the parents left early in the morning and didn't come home til late at night. You could tell how lonely this poor girl was and that she just wanted one of her parents to talk to her...I wanted to cry...And these folks probably made $300K or more...their take out bills were like $1000 a week!
These are the parents I'm addressing in my posts...
Gosh, if we each made $100k in our professions, my kids would be in daycare/private school/nanny with bells on!!!!!!!!! Unfortunately, if we did daycare now, my income would cover daycare and that's it, we'd get a tax credit of about $2400 at the end of the year, and we'd be in a higher tax bracket. We have both worked before for our 1st child's first year, had some extra money, but at the end of the day, I saw her for 1-2 hours & during that time we were driving home, I was fixing dinner, eating then putting her down for the evening. I felt very cheated during that time. So we figured with the 2nd one, giving all my money to daycare was a no-brainer....
I don't understand women who CHOOSE to have a baby and drop that baby off at daycare for 10-12 hours a day beginning at 3-6 weeks old... not really a person I'd like to know.
How about 9 hours a day starting at 10 weeks old?
You might really like me if you got to know me. After I get home from work, which I enjoy, and which pays the bills and allows me to save for our retirement and her college, I cook dinner, sit down to eat with my husband and daughter, help her with her homework if she needs it and take her to dance class on the days she goes. I also take her to the doctor when she's sick, teach Sunday School and volunteer with the PTA at her school. On the weekends we garden together, ride bikes, walk the dog, play board games and she has the occasional sleepover.
I'm really not an unlikeable person, even though I choose to work and enjoy it.
Great Post!! I am a teacher and all of my children have been "day care" babies. I love my job, it is part of who I am. I am also a parent and I love that job also. It absolutely is not always easy to be a working mom, although I wouldn't have it any other way. I tried being a SAHM and it just was not for me. That does not make me any less of a parent or my children any less loved. I believe that working actually makes me a better parent to my children. I am a happier mom and they benefit from that. What is sad and will always be sad is the way that us women continue to judge each other for our choices and rip each other apart. We, as women, are our own worst enemy. I have had students in my class over the years who have very career oriented parents (both) and the child is left in the care of a nanny or grandparent etc. I have to say, often these children are very happy and well adjusted on the other hand, some do not deal well with a situation like this. Granted, these situations are sad, but it is really not mine or anybody else's place to judge unless there is some type of abuse going on and in that case of course I would step in. What makes this world such an interesting place is that we are all different. When we start getting up on our little soap boxes and thinking that our way of doing things is the only and best way that is when we start sounding like judgemental fools. Different strokes for different folks!! Everyone is entitled to have an opinion, it is when we try to force our opinion or belief system on others that the claws come out.
Last edited by 5kingsinvegas; 03-07-2008 at 11:04 AM..
Reason: spelling
I personally know a SAHM who should not be spending that much time with her kids because she's crazy.
I can't tell you how much I laughed with this little comment right here. I was reading it, eyebrows frowned and all serious with the logic of the argument, and then the "she's crazy" part threw me off. Huh?!
I can't tell you how much I laughed with this little comment right here. I was reading it, eyebrows frowned and all serious with the logic of the argument, and then the "she's crazy" part threw me off. Huh?!
Lighten up, guys. Life's too short.
She really is crazy though!
I meant it as a joke. The point was we all sit there and pick apart other parents. We talk about their horrible parenting decisions and the trauma they're causing to their children. But you know what? Those people are talking about us too! Someone out there thinks my parenting decisions are wrong. We do what we feel is best for our kids. Period. I personally don't need anyone else's stamp of approval.
Maybe not at 3 but it could be a nest egg for if one of the parents ends up unable to work. Or even for when the child is older
Yeah, people have that right now, its called life insurance and savings...
Quote:
Originally Posted by NEOhioBound
And once again, like I asked the OP... what business is it of yours how other parents choose to raise their children? Does their choice effect you personally? Or do you harbor some jealousy somewhere that just can't allow you to deal with the fact that parents are allowed to do what they feel best for THEIR children
As far as affecting me personally...have you ever gone to pick up your kid from half day preschool and seen how attention starved some of the other kids are? I chat them up as best as I can but I can't help but feel guilty because my son gets to go home with me after 4 hours and only 3 days a week while some of them are there 50+ hours week in and week out...think about it...
And I'm definitely not jealous. I feel sorry for their children. And I feel sorry for the parents because they are missing out on some of the best experiences life has to offer, by choice.
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